The Daily Annoyance- May 1, 2023

Dr. Dad Bod
2 min readMay 1, 2023

In a great episode of “Seinfeld” George, who is almost always peeved, erupts about trying to live in a civilized society. I have placed the clip below.

I know that I am maybe a bit like George, but I feel justified in being so.

I live in Northern Virginia, and anyone who knows about Northern Virginia at all knows that we probably have the worst traffic in the whole damned country. The pinnacle of our Gordian Knot of traffic is the Capital beltway, which winds through Virginia, DC, and Maryland. To try to get anywhere without using the beltway is futile, and to try to get anywhere using it requires mentally preparing yourself to sit for no apparent reason for long periods of time (unless you choose to use the staggeringly expensive , privately owned express lanes. Our tax dollars at work!).

The confluence of these two situations makes it all the more perplexing when wannabe Lance Armstrongs don their tights and saddle up on their bicycles and go biking down major arteries at the height of rush hour.

Various tights wearing peckers deciding rush hour is the perfect time to ride in the street. At least these peckers are kind of off to the side, a courtesy many Northern Virginia cyclists do not extend to infuriated commuters.

Think about what has to have gone wrong in your life to get home and say to yourself “ You know, it’s time for me to pull on my silly outfit, get on my bike, ride in the middle of the street ignoring myriad bike lanes and paths, and hinder thousands of people’s ability to get home or to work. Thier plight is unimportant because I NEED my exercise” .

This isn’t “Breaking Away” nerds. You aren’t training for the Olympics and you aren’t gonna get in the Tour De France . All you are gonna get is homicidal thoughts directed at you by furious drivers who envision running you down like boy who the truck comes after in that Metallica video .

If you want to bike, great — use a path, find a trail, or if you MUST ride in the street do so at more reasonable hours. Riding in the middle of the street during rush hour is just a jerk off move and WE ARE TRYONG TO LIVE IN A SOCIETY!

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Dr. Dad Bod

I am a husband, father, teacher, and soccer coach, and aspiring writer residing in Northern Virginia. More than anything, I love having fun and pushing myself!